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Saturday night at eight o'clock discovered me not at the movies however at the Cinema Museum, a surprise gem near the Oval cricket ground in South London, located in a former workhouse which was quickly home to the young Charlie Chaplin after his mom fell on hard times.
Truth be told, I seldom endeavor south of the river. As Dave, from the Winchester Club, cautioned Arthur Daley: 'Lot of extremely wicked people' in Sarf Lunnon.
Coincidentally, the event was a one-man show by my old mate George Layton, star, director, scriptwriter, author, whose finest hour - a minimum of to my mind - was playing Des, the dodgy cars and truck mechanic in Minder.
George was reading from his collection of narratives set in the 1950s, when he was growing up in post-war Bradford. They're perfectly written, warm, funny, evocative, a piece of history, a working-class variation of Richmal Crompton's Just William experiences.
The storylines are based on the trials and adversities of a young boy being brought up by a single mother - a non-traditional family life at that time, regretfully only too common today. The Fib And Other Stories has actually remained in print given that 1975 and found its way on to the school curriculum, where it remains today.
I can't assist questioning, though, how often these marvelous texts are utilized in class these days, in between teachers packing their students' little heads with fashionable far-Left propaganda about 'white advantage', colonialism and, of course, climate change.
The kids in the monochrome school photo which formed the background to George's reading were certainly white, however no one could have described them as fortunate. Those were the days when 'austerity' meant living from hand to mouth, not having to choose a fundamental 50in flat screen TV, instead of a 65in OLED Ultra model, and just being able to pay for an iPhone 14 rather than the most recent all-singing, all-dancing AI variation.
Child poverty was genuine, bread-and-dripping, holes-in-your-shoes things, not dining on Deliveroo and unwillingly using last season's Nike fitness instructors.
Until the digital/social media revolution, children gained their understanding primarily from books, composes Littlejohn
In the 1950s, children experienced authentic difficulty, not the hardship of aspiration and imagination which blights this generation, through no fault of their own. Today, kids live by means of their mobile phones, instead of roaming complimentary and experiencing life to the complete.
Until the digital/social media transformation, children got their understanding primarily from books. Yes, TV played a huge function, as did the movies, however nowhere near the supremacy of TikTok and other apps using instantaneous satisfaction in byte-sized portions.
And how can squinting at the current CGI generated smash hit on a cellphone a couple of inches large ever compare with the sort of old-school, big screen, Technicolor and Cinemascope, best-out-of-Hollywood experience commemorated at the ?
It can't. Just as the finest images are stated to be on the radio, even better images can be found in the printed word.
One of the most depressing things I've checked out recently was the author Anthony Horowitz bemoaning the truth that his 300-page books are far too long to engage the much shorter attention periods these days's children.
No surprise child, and undoubtedly adult, literacy levels have actually plunged amazingly. All this has actually added to the shocking discovery that white, working class pupils - boys in particular - are being left behind. Even Labour's Education Secretary Bridget Phillipson has been required to admit they have been 'betrayed' by the modern-day schools system.
They struggle with an absence of adult involvement and consequent scarceness of aspiration. The white, working class young boy in George Layton's stories certainly didn't suffer any adult neglect from his aggressive mum. Nor did he do not have creativity or aspiration.
Education was the escape of hardship. It produced eloquent wordsmiths like George, in post-war Bradford - and our own dear Keith Waterhouse, late of this parish, who matured in poverty in neighboring pre-war Leeds.
Literacy is the greatest gift we can bestow on any kid. My grandmas taught me to check out before I went to school, setting me on the early roadway to a satisfying profession at the wordface instead of the relative drudgery of the office.
George Layton is thinking about taking his one-man program on the roadway, to small provincial theatres. I've got a much better idea.
If the Education Secretary wishes to reverse the betrayal of white, working class kids she might begin by choosing up the phone and welcoming George to visit schools, checking out from his brief stories.
I truthfully believe that if they could be encouraged to search for from their mobiles for an hour, they 'd be enthralled and inspired by the adventures of a young boy not that various to them, despite the range in years.
You never know, there might even be another Charlie Chaplin amongst them.
When they're not tasering one-legged 92-year-old men or nicking people for publishing hurty words on the internet, the authorities are progressively taking sidelines to supplement their income.
Some are working as painters and decorators, others as scaffolders nand shipment chauffeurs. More intriguingly, sidelines also include a DJ (PC Hammer, anyone?) and a reiki instructor, whatever that is.
My favourites are beekeeper and kickboxing coach, although the copper running a tea shop has to take the biscuit.
It's also reported that some officers are working as supermarket checkout assistants. I do not expect there's any danger of them nicking a few thiefs.
Mind how you go.
RICHARD LITTLEJOHN: Couple in their 70s who purchased an infant from a stranger are selfish in the extreme
First the frogs, now the octopuses
The unlawful migrant armada crossing the Channel daily may turn out to be the least of our problems. We now find out that a fleet of foreign octopuses from the Med is devouring crab stocks off the coast of Devon and Cornwall and threatening to put regional anglers out of service.
It's bad enough French trawlers hoovering up our fish without migrant molluscs assisting themselves to what's left.
We're likewise informed that parakeets from India and Pakistan are an 'unstoppable intrusive types' having actually escaped into the wild and are colonising cities as far afield as Plymouth and Aberdeen. No doubt we'll be putting them up in the nearest Holiday Inn previously long.
Which's before I get to the buzzard that's been dive-bombing children in a school play ground in Romford, Essex. Where the hell did that come from?
We have actually got enough difficulty with home-grown Stuka-style pigeons without importing kamikaze buzzards.
Take Labour's 'ambition' to invest a pitiful three per cent of GDP on defence by the year 2525 with a shovel-load of Maldon's finest. The way Rachel From Complaints is taxing the economy to death, there won't be any GDP left in a couple of years' time. And 3 percent of stuff all is still stuff all.
AN NHS surgeon who compared Islamist terrorists to the Nazis has actually been struck off. If he 'd stated the exact same about those of us who wish to leave the European yuman rites convention, Surkeir would have made him Attorney General.
Having just recently claimed that the original ancient Britons were black, the woke deconstructionists now allege the Vikings were Muslims. Don't these individuals ever take a day of rest?
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